Two Stories about Tolerance and Forgiveness
 
There is an ancient proverb: "Tolerance enables one to be magnanimous, and the lack of desires makes one strong." Tolerance is an extraordinary trait. It means having a magnanimous heart and a state of being filled with compassion and selflessness. It is a traditional virtue of the Chinese culture, a noble quality passed down from the gods to mankind. The following are two stories on tolerance.
 
1. If One Cannot Be a Fool and Feign Deafness, One Cannot Be the Head of a Household
 
After Guo Ziyi (697 – 781 AD) subdued the An Shi Rebellion, he accomplished the great achievement of reviving the Tang Dynasty. Consequently, Emperor Tang Daizong (727 – 779 AD, ruling from 762 – 779 AD) was very respectful of Guo Ziyi and agreed to the marriage of his daughter, Princess Shengping, to Guo Ziyi's son, Guo Ai.
 
One time, the young couple had an argument. When Guo Ai noticed his wife was acting temperamental with a princess attitude, he said angrily: "What makes you so special? You are relying on your father being the Emperor. Let me tell you, your father's country was saved when my father defeated An Lushan. My father could care less about the Emperor's throne, and that's the only reason he is not the Emperor himself!"
 
Upon hearing Guo Ai's wild statements, Princess Shengping angrily went to the palace and reported her husband's behavior to the Emperor.
 
After listening to his daughter, Emperor Tang Daizong replied calmly: "You're just a child, and there are still many things you do not understand. What your husband said is true. Our nation's land was protected by your father-in-law, Guo Ziyi. If he wanted to be the Emperor, he would already be one, and the land would not belong to us, the Li family." He urged his daughter not to accuse her husband of "plotting a rebellion" based on what he had just said in a moment of anger and to live harmoniously with him. The princess calmed down after hearing Tang Daizong's advice and returned home.
 
Guo Ziyi was quite worried after he learned about the incident. When he heard that his son had made such wild statements that bordered on treason, he immediately ordered his subordinates to tie up his son. He took his son to the palace and asked the Emperor to punish Guo Ai appropriately.
 
Tang Daizong, however, was very gracious. He comforted Guo Ziyi and said: "The young couple had a quarrel and exchanged some harsh words. We old folks should not take this seriously. Isn't there a proverb that says 'If one cannot be a fool and feign deafness, one cannot become the head of a household?' Just pretend you did not hear about the incident."
 
Upon hearing these words, Guo Ziyi no longer felt anxious and was very grateful to the Emperor. (From ZiZhi Tongjian)
 
2. Strengths and Weaknesses are both Facts
 
During the era of the Southern and Northern States (420 – 581 AD), Cui Luo was the Deputy Prime Minister of Northern Qi (550 – 577 AD). Cui was highly regarded and treated courteously by Emperor Shizong of Qi.
 
Cui Luo liked to recommend people of talent to Emperor Shizong. He recommended Xing Shao as someone who would make a good advisor to the Prime Minister as well as to be in charge of highly confidential government affairs. Because of Cui Luo's recommendation, Emperor Shizong appointed Xing Shao. Emperor Shizong came to trust Xing Shao and had the highest regard for him.
 
Because Xing Shao concurrently managed many confidential government affairs, he had many opportunities to speak to Emperor Shizong. During these conversations, Xing Shao often criticized Cui Luo, which made Emperor Shizong very upset.
 
One time, Emperor Shizong said to Cui Luo: "You always talk about Xing Shao's strengths, but Xing Shao always speaks about your weaknesses. You are such a fool!"
 
Cui Luo replied nobly: "Xing Shao speaks ill of me, and I speak well of him. We both are speaking the facts. There is nothing wrong with that!"
 
Cui Luo treated others with leniency, but was strict with himself. He not only recognized the capabilities of others and tolerated their shortcomings, but also openly faced his own flaws. What a noble attitude! (From Book on Northern Qi)
 
包容故事二则
 
古语说：「有容乃大、无欲则刚」，包容是一种非凡的气度，是一种宽广的胸怀，是一种充满了仁爱的无私境界，它是我们中华民族的传统美德，是神传给人的做人应有的高贵品质。
 
以下是包容故事二则
 

1. 不痴不聋，不做家翁
 
郭子仪扫平安史之乱后，成为复兴唐室的元勋。唐代宗非常敬重郭子仪，将女儿升平公主嫁给郭子仪之子郭暧为妻。
 
有一次小俩口吵嘴，郭暧见妻子摆出公主的架子，愤懑不平的说：「你有甚么了不起的？不就仗着你父亲是天子吗？告诉你吧，你父皇的江山是我父亲打败了安禄山才保全下来的，我父亲因为瞧不起皇帝的宝座，才没当这个皇帝！」
 
升平公主听到郭暧出此狂语，气的立即回宫禀报皇上。
 
唐代宗听完女儿的投诉后，不动声色的说：「你是个孩子，有许多事你还不懂。你丈夫说的都是实情。天下是你公公郭子仪保全下来的。如果你公公想当皇帝，早就当上了，天下就不是咱们李家的了。」他劝女儿不要抓住丈夫的一句话，乱扣「谋反」的大帽子，要和和美美的过日子。在唐代宗的劝慰下，公主消了气，主动回到了郭家。
 
郭子仪知道这事后，吓坏了，他听说儿子口出狂言，几近谋反，即刻令人把郭暧捆绑起来到宫中面见皇上，请皇上治罪。
 
可是，唐代宗却和颜悦色，一点也没有怪罪的意思，反而安慰郭子仪说：「小俩口吵嘴，话说的过了点，咱们当老人的不要认真了，不是有句俗话说‘不痴不聋，不做家翁’吗？装作没听见就行了。」
 
郭子仪听了这番话，心里的石头落了地，感到非常高兴。（《资治通鉴》）
 
2. 短长皆是实事
 
北朝北齐时代，崔逻官拜左丞相，很受皇帝世宗的器重与礼遇。
 
崔逻很喜欢荐举人才。他向世宗推荐邢卲担任丞相府的幕僚，并兼管机密政务。世宗因崔逻之推荐，遂征召邢卲。邢卲果然甚得世宗的信赖与器重。
 
邢卲因为兼管机密政务，所以有机会接近世宗。在言谈之际，邢卲常常贬低崔逻，以致引起世宗不高兴。
 
某次，世宗告诉崔逻：「你总是诉说邢卲的长处，而邢卲却专述说你的短处，你简直是个痴呆！」
 
崔逻大度的说：「邢卲述说我的短处，我诉说邢卲的长处，两人述说的都是真实的事情，这没有甚么不对啊！」
 
崔逻宽以待人，严以律己，他不仅肯定别人的长处，包容别人的缺失，而且坦然面对自己的缺失，这是何等宽宏的气度！（《北齐书》）